Well, some weeks the blog post gets done and some weeks a major storm hits and knocks out both power and reliable internet. Mostly reliable internet where I am, my parents having the foresight to buy a generator after the derico two years ago.
This particular blog post is an experiment to see if I can write something without going back and tweaking the writing. This, naturally, does not apply to spelling, just word order and word choice. So if this post seems a bit…rough around the edges, that’s why. It is an experiment, as I said.
I suppose I wouldn’t be doing this if I had any other writing ideas, but at this point, I’m a little blocked – suffering from constipation of the mind, if you will. I keep telling myself that I will have plenty to write about in about a month, when I move to Germany for an extended period of time.
Oh, have I not mentioned this? I am going to Germany to teach English because I’ve been told my degree is no longer valid and I have no experience. Right. So I’m going to get experience. Lots of experience. Doing something, I can’t lie, I’m not totally looking forward to.
Oh, who am I kidding? I’m not looking forward to teaching at all. Most of the teachers I know do a lot of work for little or no thanks and almost no pay. Besides, this is not something I have a great talent for. I can…critique pretty well, but that’s not the same thing. And I don’t do well ad-libbing in front of a crowd.
So…yes. Yes I am freaking out. I’m freaking out to the point where I freeze up and can’t do anything. I believe the term is ‘panic.’ Yes. I am panicking in some ways and it is not helping.
I have been told this is “very brave” of me, to be going off to a foreign country. I wouldn’t call it brave – it’s an act of desperation. I don’t see another way out of living with my parents until I die, having to keep my opinions to myself (or try to anyway) and live under someone else’s roof. I want a life of my own and I want one badly enough to try something crazy to get it.
So, brave? No. Stupid? Possibly. Do I see another way out? No. No, I do not. It’s time for a blind leap of faith.
Even though I’m not looking forward to teaching, I intend to be damn good at it. If I’m going to do a job, I’m going to do it right.
The upside to all of this is that my blog is going to get a lot more interesting. After all, it will be from a somewhat warped American mind living abroad.
Beyond that…I think I’m going to shift the posting day from Wednesdays to Thursdays because I don’t work on Thursdays.
And that wraps it up for the news-and-experiment post. Hopefully something interesting will happen before next Thursday.