Yesterday was my birthday and in practice with September 8th being a very bad day for me, I caught a cold. I was forced to cancel my birthday plans and spent the evening watching The Muppet Show and sniffling.
Within two seconds of me mentioning I didn’t feel well, mom was already plying me with Airborne. I have yet to take any, being overly suspicious of taking my recommended upper limit of vitamin C all in one go, but that brings me to the common cold and the ever popular home remedies we use to cure it.
Okay, that’s a misnomer. There’s no cure for the common cold. There are only things that can help our bodies fight the good fight and make us feel better in the meantime. Things like chicken soup, orange juice and over-the-counter meds are old staples (at least in the U.S.), but there’s nothing quite like the bizarre when you can’t face another can of Campbell’s.
I have a friend whose go-to treatment is whiskey, honey and lemon juice – a single shot, heated in the microwave just long enough to liquefy the honey. I’ve never tried this one, but I bet it burns all the way down. On the upside, whiskey tastes better than cough syrup. I also want to toss out there that I think cough syrup tastes better than Jagermister, which should tell you how I feel about Jager.
Along the same vein, my brother desperation cure (when you ask yourself, “Am I feeling that bad,” and the answer is, “Yes,”) is a shot glass of equal parts lemon juice and honey with one clove of crushed garlic and a dash of hot sauce. His explanation for these ingredients is quite scientific and involves doses of vitamin C, anti-bacterial properties, dilation of blood vessels and what have you. I was sick when he gave me the explanation, but I swear it makes sense. And I’ve had success with this, but it does not taste good. In fact, I can’t emphasize enough how not good it tastes.
My personal bizarre treatment? 2 cubes of chicken bullion dissolved in hot water with hot sauce and a little parsley to give it color and lots and lots of stuff to drink. Yes, there’s a lot of salt in the bullion, but I’m pretty desperate for it after all the liquids I consume. I also use a Neti pot, which is little pitcher you fill with water and a saline solution and the pour through your nasal cavities. It feel about like it sounds, but it does the trick. (Yeah – it’s not for everyone, however, if you were a swimmer as a kid, like me, and inhaled chlorinated water a time or two, you’ll be pleased to find how little it hurts in comparison.)
Today’s treatment will involved birthday cake, because that make everything better.